Flynt Flossy, Yung Humma, Whatchyamacallit, Pretty Raheem
November 11, 2013
With each opener, The Blue Note slowly filled up more and more with Polo’s and backwards MU hats. Eventually rapper Pretty Raheem took the stage to start the audience off right with a crowd favorite, “Cavity.”
Soon enough, front man Flynt Flossy and his trusty sidekick joined Pretty Raheem to assist in the lyrical lovemaking.
And then it happened.
It was so unexpected. In order to keep the show going, the Turquoise Jeep crew carefully explained how vital it was that they show Columbia how they work the ladies. Four willing women were plucked from the crowd and seated in chairs on stage where they received the lap dance of lifetime.
It changed me.
As I witnessed the raunchy happenings on stage, I questioned all of my career goals. Should I pursue a career in rap? What if I get really freakishly good at dancing, too? That’s like a double whammy; I’d be irresistible. Why am I not a rapping twerk god touring through college towns across the country?
In my mind, minutes turned to hours as I agonized about how regular my life was but eventually the music was cut and the girls were asked to return to the crowd.
The show continued with classics like “Naughty Farmer” and “Stretchy Pants” but then all of the ladies in the crowd were told to move up to the front of the show. All of the men looked around at each other with looks of despair and defeat.
At that exact moment in time, all the guys in the room were thinking the same thoughts: “Who will I eventually get to smang it with now?” and “This is no way to treat a pirate!”
Now all of the females in the crowd were invited to come on stage to dance their little hearts out with the crew for the final song, “Lemme Smang It.” Without hesitation, girls hopped on stage from left and right and twerking like nobody’s ever twerked before. All the while, the males were left behind on the dance floor to half-heartedly smang it by their lonesome.
And just like that, the show was over, and it was time to leave. Flynt Flossy offered to take photos with any fans wanting to capture the memory with their favorite rapper.
Post written by The Blue Note marketing intern Ian Pauley.